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Change Your Thoughts and the Rest Will Follow

"Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.” - George Bernard Shaw Creatures of Comfort Change often has a negative connotation for many people, especially when we have no choice. We are creatures of comfort and we automatically seek out what feels good in the moment. We long for comfort and this usually comes from that which we know; that which is familiar to us. Our minds and nervous systems are designed to find and attach meaning to everything. Something new can feel stressful, even scary.Comfort in Patterns Your mind and your nervous system has to understand and adapt to the unknown and this process feels uncomfortable on many levels. Our nervous system works primarily by conditioning and by repetition we notice consistency and assume patterns. This system is really there to serve us in helping us being more efficient and to be able to do more, with less effort. Your mind is designed to always look for the best way. Through repetition we learn certain orders and sequences in which things happen and we learn to recognize and respond according to these sequences. We feel more and more confident when we are familiar with something. Recognize the Patterns Simply be aware of the fact that there is a part of you that responds and acts based on your past experiences and associations. The challenge is to go from one pattern, one that does not serve you anymore, to one which will serve you more. Adapting to change, whether at work or at home will feel uncomfortable at first, but rest assured that the uncomfortable will become comfortable as you form new associations and new patterns of association. Change is Inescapable Remember that old saying: "If you can't beat them, join them"? All of life is constantly in a process of change. Nothing stays the same. It's the nature of all of life, including you. Even if you do nothing, life will still change. It's tempting to resist the change and hold onto what we know, but doing that often leaves us stressed and unhappy. What if instead, you make the choice to initiate changes and embrace new things? Change is Growth The process of making the uncomfortable comfortable is the way we grow as human beings. As you become comfortable with new things, they become part of your comfort zone.  Expanding this zone expands yourself as a person. The need to grow and develop is a need that all humans have. Without growth it is difficult to be happy for any length of time. Although it feels uncomfortable in the moment, personal and professional growth feel fulfilling in the long term and make us feel good in a more lasting way. It creates a sense of pride in yourself. Change How You Think to Change How You Feel All change starts with a change of mind. You have to start by changing your thoughts about the change.  Find a more positive way to look at [...]

By |2019-11-05T07:43:52-04:00February 1st, 2018|Happiness Tips|Comments Off on Change Your Thoughts and the Rest Will Follow
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7 Unique Ways to Make Someone Smile

Making Someone Smile is Easier Than You Think. Do you want to put a smile on someone's face?  Maybe make their day a little bit brighter?  It doesn't have to take much time or money on your part.  In fact, many things can be done as a part of your normal routine and cost little or nothing.  We  often underestimate how people can be affected by an act of kindness and they are contagious, so it's well worth the small effort. Try out one or more of these 7 ways today, and put a smile on someone's face. Spread a little happiness today! 1. Send a positive message. We often don't take the time to send a positive email or text message. Handwritten notes are even more rare...just grab a "Post-It". Start a new practice: take a few minutes to write/send a positive note on a regular basis. You just might start an epidemic! 2. Take someone out to lunch or coffee or invite them to your home.  You will get to know each other even better than you do right now. If you feel like being more adventurous, throw a small party for several of your friends or colleagues and put smiles on a multitude of faces. 3. Give someone an inspirational book to read. You will feel good doing it, reading the book can change or inspire the person, and they will think of you every time they read it. You can share my book, 21 Days to Happiness, or one of the books from my recommended reading list! 4. Offer to babysit or take care of a pet for a few hours. You know the value of being able to have a few hours of "alone time" without worrying about the children and pets. Don't wait to be asked. Offer to do it at a time when the person can do something fun and relaxing. 5. Deliver a meal to someone you know that is sick or having a rough time. We have all been sick and know the last thing you want to do is to cook. There are also times when life is tough and it is hard to do all of the daily chores. You can be a tremendous help by providing a meal that can be enjoyed. 6. Volunteer your time to a local charity.  Every minute you dedicate will cause many smiles.  It is very rewarding to help without being asked. 7. Thank everyone that supports you throughout the day.  The list of those that you come in contact with is endless.  Remember family and friends, co-workers, teachers, store employees, janitors, those that deliver your mail and staff at restaurants. Don't Forget to Smile So there you have it. Seven ideas for ways to make someone smile. There is one more way that can't be ignored: reveal a genuine smile to everyone you meet.​ You will experience how easy it is to get others to smile! Learn more about happiness and how to spread happiness to others in my book 21 Days [...]

By |2019-11-05T07:44:56-04:00January 30th, 2018|Happiness Tips|Comments Off on 7 Unique Ways to Make Someone Smile
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Finding Balance at Work and Home

Sometimes We Chase the Wrong Things In a culture obsessed with high tech gadgetry, cellphones, credit cards, fast cars, large houses, and job titles, it should be no surprise that most people experience stress and anxiety.  The strain of striving after material advantage and the dictates of the Almighty Dollar have made many people virtual slaves in their jobs. Even after working more than 50 hours a week or getting every material need and luxury that money can buy, many people still live unhappily.  Success at work, instead of bringing fulfillment, leaves many people with a feeling emptiness and disillusionment. But there is still hope for the tired professional and the exhausted worker.  Stress and anxiety need not ruin lives and careers.  To get back on track, it may be helpful to consider the following advice on how to be an achiever who lives a balanced life: Identify what's important What we really are lacking is balance.  A good start would be to have a career and life plan that balances your time and effort between work and home. If we plan carefully, we will most likely make the right action or choices. Life shouldn't be a big enigma. Life can be made simple and enjoyable. A career or life plan must start with having a stated purpose. Knowing what you really want helps you get rid of unnecessary fatigue brought about by things which are not really important.  Knowing your priorities also help you get rid of unnecessary worries and prevents you from wasting energy. Writing it down --- putting your plan on paper --- is the first step on having a balanced life. Your first task is to identify what you want.  Do you prefer to have  a fun personal or family life, vibrant health more than having financial success or a well-respected position?  Maybe you can have both without making any sacrifice in terms of time or quality of life? Write it down! Goals are much easier to achieve when we identify them and list them on paper. Quick questions To get our bearings, it is important to be constantly aware of our priorities.  A good way to start redefining one's priorities is by answering the following questions: Are you neglecting yourself physically, mentally or spiritually? Are you neglecting your spouse, your children, your peers? Are you fulfilling your commitments? Are you operating in your comfort zone? Don't be discouraged if you answered "yes" to some of those questions. Taking a moment to acknowledge where your life is out of balance is a great first step toward happiness. Once you've identified problem areas, you can begin making changes that lead you toward a happier, more fulfilled life. It's All About Balance You have the power to manage your everyday stresses. You have opportunity to make healthy changes in your life. It may take time, but don't be afraid to start now. These helpful tips will ease the pressures and get you moving toward happiness. Focus – Take a [...]

By |2019-11-05T07:45:19-04:00January 22nd, 2018|Happiness Tips|Comments Off on Finding Balance at Work and Home
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How Office Plants Can Boost Your Happiness

Get a plant and bring nature indoors. Well, most of us are eager to take a few days off for the holidays. Here's an idea: plan to buy a plant for your office or home. If you don't have the chance to go outdoors as much as you would like, why not bring a little outdoors, indoors? Even a small plant can make a big difference! Working indoors all day can feel draining sometimes. One simple way to boost your happiness in the office is to bring a little nature into your workspace with you! While you can't control the indoor climate in an office, you can improve the way the space looks and feels by brightening it up with a plant or two. Office spaces can easily become too hot, too cold, too dry or too damp. Finding the perfect balance of temperature and air quality for a group of people is a big challenge as we all have different preferences. In addition printers, copiers, computer monitors, floor coverings, paint and wallpaper can release substances into the air which affects the quality of the indoor climate. The potential consequences of poor air quality are well known: irritated eyes, headache, skin complaints and dry membranes in the nose and mouth. This is not only unpleasant, it is also unhealthy. Yet you can easily improve the indoor climate by using plants! Plants help create a healthy indoor climate and a happier workplace. Not only do they put water vapor back into the air, they also absorb heat and filter dust and harmful substances out of the air. The effect of plants in the workplace has been the subject of repeated scientific investigation. Time after time the conclusion is the same: plants work! Here are some ways they help improve the quality of our work areas. Fewer complaints & less illness Some indoor palms give off a lot of water, which helps keep humidity in the air and prevent dry eyes and nasal membranes. Plants like sword ferns cleanse the air of the formaldehyde released by building materials, paper and furniture. Other good air-purifying plants are the rubber plant, English ivy and date palm. More plants means less stress The presence of plants does not just affect the physical climate. Researchers have discovered that a view of greenery can result in a demonstrable reduction in stress within five minutes. Research has shown that people who spend more than four hours a day working at a computer monitor feel better and are more productive with plants in the workplace! The green view Companies are increasingly willing to accept that they have a key role to play in protecting the environment and the welfare of their employees, and therefore often strive for a 'green' image. Presenting such an image starts with a healthy indoor environment. Plants at work fit perfectly within many company policies. Check with your employer to see what the workplace rules are regarding plants in the office. Bring a little bit of [...]

By |2019-11-05T07:45:35-04:00December 13th, 2017|Happiness Tips|Comments Off on How Office Plants Can Boost Your Happiness
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Giving Happiness

We ALL want happiness We all want to feel useful and make a difference. It is even better when we get appreciation and recognition. We tend to look for some kind of validation from friends, family and our colleagues or boss. It makes us feel good about ourselves and raises our confidence in ourselves. It can create feelings of positive self-esteem, which is very important. It makes us happy. But how do you get the appreciation and recognition, or those positive responses from others? Be the happiness GIVER Instead of waiting for others to notice the good things about ourselves, be the person who notices the good in others. Make a point to praise the people around you, even for small things. Thank a person who holds a door open for you. Offer appreciation for a job well done. Notice the things your peers do well and compliment them. Point out the little things your friends or partner do which you often take for granted and take time to be thankful for them. Watch the Happiness Multiply When you give happiness to someone else, an amazing thing happens: their happiness in turn makes us happier, too. It happens immediately. We experience a sense of satisfaction. It elevates our self-esteem. We feel good. By making others happy, we get happiness. So let's be proactive and increase our personal happiness by giving happiness to others. My book, 21 Days to Happiness, talks about sharing kindness with others as part of your journey toward greater happiness. With the American Thanksgiving and the holidays around the corner, I hope you enjoy time spent gathered with family and friends, and I hope giving the gift of happiness to the special people in your life makes this holiday season a special, happy time. Ingrid Kelada Business Psychologist/Happiness Expert KCC Inc.

By |2019-11-05T07:47:39-04:00November 19th, 2017|Happiness Tips|Comments Off on Giving Happiness
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How to Use Success Strategies for Happiness

Choices, choices Success and happiness tend to go hand and hand, but you have to define what would make you feel successful and happy. Sometimes success and happiness will lead you in two different directions. For example, you may find that your current situation makes you happy, but if you ever want a promotion, you will probably have to give up some things in order to step up to your new challenges. You should always consider what is more important to you at that time. While financial success can be appealing, the happiness which comes from personal success often lasts longer and feels better. Set Your Happiness Goals Life can be frustrating or seem meaningless at times: get up, to work, run a bunch of errands, repeat! You should set some key goals in order to find happiness and success. Take time to consider what kind of life you want to have. We are all different, so ask yourself: what would make me truly happy? Be intentional about setting goals for yourself. Break your goals into smaller, bite-sized pieces and aim for those steps which lead you toward the bigger goal. Be flexible. You may change your mind about reaching certain goals as you learn more about yourself and the goals you've set. Your priorities may change because you've taken a new job or started a new relationship. That's okay. Changing your mind isn't giving up or failing, it's about being agile and adaptable. Adjust your goals to reflect your updated ideals. Just Do Happy Happiness and success do take some practice. What daily behaviors will make you feel great? Right now, close your eyes and think of three things which you want to accomplish on your journey toward being happy and successful. Jot them down. Begin by thinking of small steps and actions that will help you achieve the things you really want. Place your list somewhere you can see it on a daily basis. Hang it next to the bathroom mirror or on your refrigerator or next to your computer monitor. Do something everyday that will help you achieve your goals. Being happy and successful are possible for everyone, but the definitions of happiness and success also differ from person to person. Don't get distracted by trying to achieve goals that other people value. Life is too short. Do you! Make sure you identify and revisit what's important to you and spend your time and energy pursuing the individual path which will take you toward your own happier future. My book, 21 Days to Happiness, talks more about being intentional with our goals as part of the 21 day journey toward a happier life. Each chapter contains more resources and tips to help you craft your own happiness. I'd love for you to spend three weeks with me!

By |2020-08-02T14:38:04-04:00October 25th, 2017|Happiness Tips|Comments Off on How to Use Success Strategies for Happiness
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5 Choices to Create Happiness

We've all met people who seem to be happy most of the time. You may have assumed these people are just naturally happy, or that they are the lucky people who have an easy life, or they had really loving parents. Often, this is just not the case. In my book, 21 Days to Happiness, I explain how happy people make specific choices regarding their thinking and behavior. Happy people tend to consciously or unconsciously think and behave in ways that result in happiness. Unhappy people unconsciously think and behave in ways that create unhappiness. What choices and thoughts are you making about your happiness? Wherever you are on the happiness continuum, you have the ability to make changes that improve how happy you are. Here are 5 key areas to help you get started. 1. GRATITUDE Happy people are consistently grateful for what they have, rather than complaining about what they don’t have. They notice the many gifts and blessings that come their way and they frequently express gratitude for the everyday things in their lives – the beauty of nature, the food they eat, the smile on a friend’s face, their ability to see, hear, walk, talk. Even many disabled people who may not have the blessings of eyesight, hearing, speech or legs are often happy people because they focus on what they do have and what they can do, rather than focusing on what they are missing out on. 2. OPTIMISM Happy people see the glass as half full, while unhappy people tend to be pessimistic – to see the glass as half empty. Optimistic thinking does not just happen - it is a choice regarding how you see life. Optimistic people are optimistic because they unconsciously or consciously CHOOSE to be optimistic. Instead of noticing everything that is a problem, happy people to look for opportunities. Happy people realize that their thinking is the beginning of a creative process that leads to success. By thinking in positive ways, they move themselves to act in ways that move them closer to their dreams. 3. KINDNESS Happy people choose to be kind and compassionate toward themselves and others. Happy people have learned that how they treat themselves and others determines much of how they feel. Happy people do not wait to be happy before being kind to themselves and others. They realize that their happiness is the RESULT of their caring behavior, not the CAUSE of it. They are kind, caring and compassionate whether or not they feel like it. They have chosen this way of being, and their happiness is the result. 4. FORGIVENESS Happy people do not harbor resentment toward others, even others who have been mean and hurtful toward them. They realize that resentment makes them unhappy, so they choose to allow people their humanness and forgive them their hurtful behavior. Because happy people tend not to take personally others’ uncaring behavior, they don’t get their feelings hurt in the same way that people do who take others’ behavior personally. Happy [...]

By |2019-11-05T07:49:20-04:00October 10th, 2017|Happiness Tips|Comments Off on 5 Choices to Create Happiness
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